How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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