Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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