Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize