Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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