You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize