so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize