worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
