She said her name was "party"
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
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