I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
