so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
