she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
