She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
