I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
