had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize