It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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