how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
