Why are handjobs necessary in class?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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