It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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