Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
