So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize