Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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