So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
