small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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