Christians are straight up FREAKS
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
