but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
