If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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