But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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