Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Randomize