Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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