i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
