..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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