Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize