yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
operation have a gay friend backfired
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize