He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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