So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
