She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
