Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
