We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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