Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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