Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
