also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
