What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
They have beer where we have blood.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize