OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Life is so much better after having sex.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
