it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
