so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
