stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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