You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
