what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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