apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
