This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
