Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize